Revenge of the Trolls

By S. Q. Neemie -
published March 2, 2021
5149 words

An Internet troll spends his day complaining online about his favorite superhero movie franchise, not realizing that his souped-up computer has the power to make whatever he types real. When he sarcastically suggests the characters America Man, Spiderboy, and Nordicman are gay for each other, it creates a very unusual day of filming for the actors.

Eugene Whitehouse had spent most of the day bent over the hulk of his computer rig, dismantling his core processor and integrating it with the super processing unit he had picked up for a song at the police auction. Originally, the unit had been part of a Reality Enhancement machine, but when the gym that had purchased the machine went under–spectacularly and messily–the machine had been broken up and sold piecemeal. Eugene had sat all day at the auction and spent most of his savings to pick up the bulk of the Reality Enhancer’s processors. He’d have to go without the latest games for a few months, but his baby was gonna fly.

“No more lag,” he crooned as he carefully attached the wires to the expanded console on his bedroom desk. “Gonna soar, gonna kill my games, gonna reply in triple time. That’s right.” He stroked the flat plastic top of his computer console. “You’re so juiced up now you’re fucking wet, aren’t you, baby?” Reaching around the computer’s plastic casing, he switched his new setup on and the five monitors facing him came alive with a blue light, which bathed Eugene’s toothy, rat-like face in an unhealthy blue glow. He was wearing a stained undershirt and greyish tighty-whities, threadbare and stretched to the point that one side sagged off of his narrow, bony hip and one leg hole drooped down away from his thigh.

Eugene slid into his padded, $400 computer chair–which was top of the line two months ago but was already patched here and there with duct tape–and flipped on his array of computer screens. Grinning with a mouth full of too-large teeth barely held in place by the metal band of a retainer, he uploaded the Beddit page for the Astounding Boys superhero movies and read through the latest posts. The computer, interfacing with the Reality Enhancer unit, began to whirr and click as it geared up its full processing power.

“All right,” said Eugene after he’d read all he wanted to. “Time to bring the pain.” He cracked the knuckles of his long, white fingers and started typing.


He sat back, grinning around his thick mouthful of teeth and sucking on his retainer. It wasn’t too long before the messages started pinging in on the right side of his screen.

astoundboy67 jesus not this asshole again

buckyroo859 what they do this time

whispybutchrispy aw, yeah, I know what this is about bring the pain dude

“You fucking know I will, Whispy,” grinned Eugene, making a mental note to have some of his online buddies go after astoundboy67. He scratched his scraggly, strawberry-blond chin and turned back to his main post.

–> That’s right, proud Astounding Boysfans, I said it. For too long we’ve allowed this series to fuck about with its little social engineering agenda behind the scenes while we reward them with our money and eyeballs. They fucking owe us for all the support we’ve given them over the years, and it’s high time we show them the raw power we have by refusing to file into the theaters for the next movie like good little Boysfans. That’s right, ladies and gentlemen

Eugene scowled at the line for a second, pursing his lips, then crossed out part of the line and kept typing.

–> That’s right ladies and gentlemen, our very own Rueben Javreau, famed director of no fewer than six Astounding Boys movies, including the critically panned but essential Spiderboy on the Web (see my definitive review here) has RESIGNED as director from the Astounding Boys’ latest installment, The Astounding Super-Duper War, which was sure to be his magnum opus, even though the movie is already two weeks into the filming stage.

Eugene paused for a moment to take a few huge gulps from one of the four Mountain Dew 2-liters standing among the clutter of video game cases, used tissues, and half-eaten microwave burritos, his huge Adam’s apple bobbing in his thin neck as he chugged. While he drank, he kept his eyes on his chat screen, grunting in satisfaction as the replies pinged in.

charliehorse01 Nooooooooo

dangerfield what the actual fuck is that???

pansypleasure07 what? javreau is our fucking hero! how could he do that

Eugene set the two-liter down, wiped his sticky mouth with the back of his hand, and cracked his knuckles before driving into type again.

–> You’re right to be shocked, my Astounding brothers. Pansypleasure is right, I’ve argued extensively that Javreau is the only legitimate director of the Astounding Boys franchise and my personal hero, and that only he understands the mix of alpha energy and coded politics of the Astounding Boys universe. But with this latest shenanigan–

“Shenanigan?” Eugene asked the air, scratching his thin, hairy stomach under his stained undershirt. He wrinkled his nose. “Queer. But–ah, fuck it, shenanigan is fine."

–> this latest shenanigan, I say that we boycott Javreau–not just for the Astounding Boys movies, but for any other cinematic high culture dickspittle he manages to spurt out now that he’s decided he’s too good for us.

Eugene’s computer gurgled and whirred again, the mutated bundle of jury-rigged disk drives flashing a series of angry red flashes. The Reality Enhancer unit was speed-testing its connection to Eugene’s computer, building up processing power to perform its vital functions–whatever those may be. In moments it would be ready to receive instruction.

And what is the reason that Javreau has given for this sudden, eleventh-hour resignation? He CLAIMS–and this is what really gets to me, Boysfans–he CLAIMS that it’s UNFAIR for him to be the primary director of an acclaimed cinematic universe franchise when WOMEN are so–his words–”underrepresented” among movie directors! So he’s leaving his directorial post, not because of a scandal, not because of creative differences, and NOT (clearly) because he’s paying attention to what fans of the franchise want, but because he’s so butt-hurt that enough directors weren’t born with a vagina!

The chats kept pinging in. Eugene kept one eye on them as he typed furiously, hunched over his keyboard with his mouth hanging slightly open.

velasquelle8me doesn’t seem so bad to me - javreau’s been fading as a director

whatnow strongly disagree…America Man III was intense

californae67 javreau should resign–it’s time for a woman to direct!

alphacat51 dude, @californae67, see yourself out the door–this is a space for true fans

–> And WHO has Colossal Studios decided to put into Javreau’s place? None other than Alexandra Ortega, whose career films include three–count them, three!–movies, all of which were art films so far up their own asses that they form the cinematic equivalent of a human centipede.

“Aw fuck, yeah, nice metaphor,” said Eugene, adjusting the surprisingly meaty bulge barely contained by his sagging underwear. “Keep it coming, Gene-meister.” He cracked his knuckles again and kept typing.

–> I think I speak for all Boysfans when I say that we don’t want Ortega’s blend of cinema verite and emotional storytelling anywhere NEAR the Astounding Boys franchise. Sure, that style might be okay if you’re a limp-dick hipster who pretends he gives a rat crap about the plight of Afghanistan refugees or something, but we Boysfans know what we want in our movies and it’s not that. What we want is explosions, –

boysaremyboys fuck yeah

–> bad-ass cinematography, –

greengauge31 tell em

–> and none of this politically correct, every-loser-gets-a-chance BULLSHIT. That’s what Javreau used to stand for, but I guess the Hollywood elites finally got to him. So, I’m done with it, and I think you should be too. The way I see it, we can all go to the new movie, give them our money, and come out angry and disappointed and betrayed–or we can leave now, before we hand over our hard-earned cash. Who’s with me?

das_veferens fuck, I’m in

thebakeisalie BOYCOTT JAVREAU*

tiny_timmy honestly I’m on board but I still do want to see the new movie

Eugene’s overclocked computer suddenly whistled and a series of blue lights flashed through the thin plastic casing. The Reality Enhancer was ready. All it needed was a direction. Eugene, still typing, didn’t notice the lights or the unnatural, almost biological noises coming from the snarl of wires and machinery.

–> And I’m sorry to tell you, Boysfans, that the troubles with Ortega go far beyond her taking Javreau’s rightful place at the head of the The Astounding Super-Duper War. In her most recent interview (you can see the shitstorm here), she’s quoted as saying she’d like to explore the SENSITIVITY of the Astounding Boys’ franchise. The SENSITIVITY, her words, no lie. So, what–are we making fucking CHICK FLICKS NOW?? Are the Astounding Boys going to spend their time painting their nails and talking about their feelings, not even bothering to shoot out a “no homo” now and then?

The Reality Enhancer processor welded to Eugene’s computer whirred as it recognized a phrase in Eugene’s typing. It was so close to receiving a directive…

–> Are we likely to see what so many girls out there want, a romantic three-way between America Man, Spiderboy, and Nordicman? Is THAT the horror that’s going to be visited on us? Imagine how the Hollywood elites would react to THAT, my brothers…

Eugene kept typing, grunting as he did, but the Reality Enhancer was no longer paying attention. It had received a directive, and it was already using Eugene’s beefed-up wifi to reach out into the world and fulfill its mission.

Hollywood, USA

Evan Christopher, the actor playing America Man, was playing Furious Birds on his phone between takes, his handsome face an attractive mix of contentment and concentration. His impossibly sculpted physique, enhanced by the molded plastic of his red-white-and-blue suit, somehow still managed to look natural as he relaxed on his set chair.

His phone pinged and he scowled pleasantly. What the fuck was this? There was a sudden reddish sheen over the light his phone was casting, and on the red glow was a barely perceptible–what? It looked almost as if there was white writing overlaid on the red sheen, catching his eye but not quite distinct enough for him to read. Perhaps if he just concentrated a little harder–

He blinked suddenly. His phone was back to normal, the little furious bird on his game screen staring at him angrily for taking his time. Evan wiped his mouth, surprised to find a fair amount of sticky drool on his chin. Fuck, did he blank out or something?

He didn’t have time to consider it for very long before Helm Chessworth, the actor playing Norseman, crossed in front of him. The brawny, blond actor was putting his own phone away and looked confused, a hard line on his face between his piercing blue eyes. He was tossing the plastic prop hammer he used between his thick hands.

“Chessworth,” said Evan with a nod at the broad-shouldered man.

“Hey, Christopher,” said Helm, his face still confused, his bearded chin jutting out in a rebellious way that made him look younger than he was. “I–hmmm–I wanted to talk to you about the fight scene we’re shooting tomorrow.”

“Sure thing, buddy,” said Evan, pushing his own confusion away and giving Helm one of his trademark, dimply smiles. “What’s up?”

“I was thinking,” said Helm, still scowling, “that maybe we could try something a little, um, different with the scene where the three of us are fighting. I’ve got an idea that I think will really improve the film, but I kind of want to try it out before I take it to Ortega.”

Evan smiled and stood up. “I’m here for you, man,” he said, putting his hand on the thick actor’s shoulder. Fuck, but Helm was muscled, he thought. I mean, sure–everyone was, that was their job, but he’d never quite noticed how the man’s shoulder was like granite under the smooth silk of his white skin, how much power writhed right under his hand, as if Helm could just pick him up whenever he wanted and–

“So, let’s do this,” Evan said, pulling his hand away guiltily, feeling an uncomfortable flex in the molded foam rubber of his crotch. “Where’s Tim?”

They found the actor playing Spiderboy, Tim Amsterdam, in a quiet corner of the set, trying to teach himself how to juggle.

“Hey, guys, watch this,” he said with a goofy grin, tossing a few balls into the air and clumsily trying to catch them as they fell back down toward him. Evan and Helm watched as he managed to juggle a few cycles before the balls slipped out of his fingers and rolled in separate directions across the set.

“Dude! That’s the best that I’ve ever done!” crowed Tim, giving Evan and Helm a huge grin as he chased the balls across the floor. “I’m gonna be a pro at it by the end of this movie, I swear. You’ll see.”

“That’s great, Tim,” said Evan, resisting the urge to reach out and ruffle the young man’s hair. He turned to Helm, and was surprised to see the hulking man was blushing, his cheeks a brilliant red.

“What’s up, Helm?” he asked. “Don’t you want to try the scene?”

“You guys want to run lines with me?” asked Tim excitedly, bobbing up and down on the balls of his feet. “That’s awesome! Usually it’s just the set manager that wants to–I thought you guys were too important to–” He blushed the same shade as Helm. “I just mean, that’d be really awesome. I would love your pointers on what I can do to be more, you know, man-sexy and stuff.” He struck a pose that looked like a slender version of Helm’s powerful stance and then giggled. “Not too good at it yet, huh?”

“Helm thinks he’s got an improvement on the fight scene,” said Evan. “C’mon, man, tell him.” He swatted Helm, who was staring at the ground, on the arm.

“It’s just an idea,” mumbled Helm.

“Aw, don’t be shy, Helm,” said Evan with a puzzled grin. If there was one thing the beefy actor was, it was confident, so seeing this version of Helm was a little disconcerting. “You’re acting like you’re on your first date! It’s just me and Tim. Tell us what you have in mind.”

Helm visibly swallowed, his massive neck muscles pulsing, as he shot a sly look under dark lashes toward Tim, who was still energetically bouncing up and down on his toes.

“I was thinking,” he said to Tim, still looking at the ground but now stealing glance after glance at Tim’s bouncing form. “You know that part where Evan and I grab you and launch you at Ambassador Evil? I was thinking we could do a little modification of that.”

“Sounds awesome,” said Tim, grinning, then yelped as Helm stepped forward and seized him around the waist. Helm lifted Tim up two feet off the floor and the acrobatic young man instinctively wrapped his legs around Helm’s narrow waist, his hands on the massive slabs of Helm’s pecs.

“Geez, Mr. Chessworth,” burbled Tim. The shock of being manhandled by the huge actor seemed to cause him to revert to the overly respectful, shy young man he had been at the first of filming. He stared at Helm’s handsome face, his eyes wide. “You’re so strong,” he whispered.

Helm chuckled, the blush draining from his face. “You can call me Helm, kid, remember?” he said.

“R-right,” said Tim, his eyes still wide, his hands gripping the skin-tight rubber stretched over Helm’s chest. “Helm. Right.”

Evan blinked at the pair of them. It was the pose that they were using for the launch scene, for sure, but with the two actors staring into each other’s eyes the pose looked a lot more–honeymoonish. Like Helm was going to take the young actor, lay him out on a bed, and then really start energetically–

“Evan,” said Helm, glancing away from Tim’s eyes long enough to see the corn-fed actor pulling distractedly at the crotch of his costume,“little help?”

“Oh, man, my bad,” said Evan. Fuck, he was drooling again, too. Shaking his head, he stepped up and took his position behind Tim, supporting the young man’s back as Helm used the meaty hands almost encircling Tim’s waist to shift the rubber-clad actor’s body higher up Helm’s massive chest. Soon, Tim was leaning backwards onto Evan, the back of his head resting on Evan’s sculpted shoulder. Evan got a good whiff of Tim’s hair and growled quietly before he even realized he was doing it. His celebrity cock pushed angrily against the crotch of his rubber-foam pants.

Once he was sure Tim was securely supported by Evan, Helm let his hands slide down Tim’s waist and grip his thighs. He pulled Tim’s legs slightly apart and Tim grunted a surprised little “Uunh!” into Evan’s ear as his toned, rubber-clad ass spread slightly over Helm’s famous 8-pack.

“So now we launch him?” said Evan, his heart beating fast as he resisted the urge to wrap his muscled arms around the slender actor’s chest and bury his face into Tim’s hair.

Helm grinned, his ice-blue eyes meeting Evan’s across the Spiderboy bridge between them. “Not…quite…yet,” he panted as he slid his hands over Tim’s black-and-red-clad thigh muscles. His thick thumbs dug under the waistband of the form-fitting briefs of Tim’s costume, releasing the hidden clasps folded against the warm skin of Tim’s hips.

“Oh wow,” said Tim as the two halves of his briefs disconnected from his costume and slid off him to bounce slightly as they hit the floor of the set. “Oh wow.” His thick, pink cock stirred in the air against the Dennis-the-Menace tuft of pubic hair at its base. Evan caught a glimpse of the round, furred peach of Tim’s ass and his mouth flooded with drool again.

“Thought this might raise the drama a little,” said Helm with a grin, letting his rough thumbs stroke Tim’s exposed hipbones.

“Oh wow,” gasped Tim again. “Geez, Helm. Mother-fudging geez, man.” Through his shoulder, Evan could feel the young man trembling. Tim’s short pink cock was standing at attention over his compact balls, basically slotted between the blue foam-rubber pecs of Helm’s suit.

Helm was staring down at the up-and-coming star’s cock like it was the first dick he’d ever seen. “This is quite a piece, Amsterdam,” he growled.

“It’s kinda small,” panted Tim, biting his lip. “I bet you guys have me beat by inches…”

“Perfect little mouthful,” growled Helm, not listening to him. He slid his hands to cup Tim’s muscular ass and pulled the young star’s crotch up to his face. His blond-bearded mouth slurped up Tim’s cock in one wet gulp and Tim jolted in Evan’s arms like a bolt of electricity had arced through him.

“Oh wowieee wow wow wow,” he babbled, his knees shaking where they pressed against Helm’s shoulders as he gripped Evan’s forearms. “Geez Helm that feels so fucking good.”

Helm pulled off Tim’s cock with a wet-sounding pop. “Haven’t you ever had your dick sucked before?”

“N-no,” stammered Tim, turning bright red.

“Jesus,” said Helm, shooting Evan a rueful grin. “How is that even possible?” Before the Spiderboy actor could answer, Helm gathered his cock back into his mouth. Tim jolted again, whimpering slightly as Helm’s talented tongue wrapped around his shaft.

Watching the A-list celebrity blowjob happening right before his eyes was driving Evan insane with the need to free his own pent-up dick, but he couldn’t move without dropping Tim, so he grit his teeth, willing himself not to buck his hips against the scratchy-but-smooth feeling of his engorged cock trying to push its way down the leg of his skin-tight costume.

Helm grunted in deep satisfaction and slowly pulled off Tim’s dick, pressing his bearded lips tightly together as Tim’s rock-hard, cut todger slipped out between them to thwack Tim’s taut, costumed stomach. With a wicked twinkle in his eye Helm hoisted Tim upward, his thickly muscled arms rippling as he raised Tim till the young actor’s ass was level with his face. Grinning maniacally, he spread Tim’s tightly muscled asscheeks and dove into his inviting crack. Tim moaned and bucked as his asshole was invaded by Helm’s pointed tongue, which wriggled and wormed inside his clenching asshole, lapped up to swirl around his balls, and then returned to push through the young man’s sphincter.

Evan watched the rigorous tongue-lashing Helm was giving his co-star with wide eyes. His dick ached to be free of it’s rubber-foam cage. Tim was panting and wheezing in his ear, too overcome by the sensations Helm’s tongue was giving him to even say geez. “Oh geeeeeee,” he yodeled, squirming so wildly on Evan’s shoulder that the America Man actor had to grip him tightly to keep Tim from tumbling down off the two-man platform he was riding.

After a thorough licking Helm pulled away, his blond beard matted with sweat and spit. “You like that, Amsterdam?” he wheezed.

Tim was still too sexed up to form words. “Yeeeeeeh,” he moaned, his tight pucker inadvertently winking at the blond actor declared Sexiest Man Alive by Peephole Magazine.

“The you’re gonna love this,” growled Helm. He shifted the young man’s ass to his left arm, the pillar-like muscles of his biceps bulging as he balanced the acrobatic actor by the base of his spine. With his free hand, Helm reached down and pulled down his costume pants. Unlike Tim’s, his briefs wouldn’t come apart so he had to roll the pants down, revealing a thick, blunt-headed prick growing out of a finely trimmed nest of straw-colored pubes. Still using only his left arm, Helm slowly lowered Tim down until his slobbery ass was just touching the hammer-headed dick of the beefy star.

For a second Helm stood stock-still, his blunt cockhead pressing lightly on Tim’s spit-slimed asshole while his blue eyes bored into Tim’s lust-clouded ones.

“You gotta tell me you want it, kid,” he growled, rolling his powerful hips slightly so that the hefty club of his cockhead pressed it’s spongy hardness more insistently at Tim’s back door.

Geez I want it so bad, Helm,” babbled Tim.

Helm grunted in satisfaction. Grabbing Tim by his narrow waist, he pressed his cockhead into Tim’s warm valley, the young man’s well-lathered asshole already parting around his thick, godlike cock–

Helm paused, long enough that Tim began to squirm petulantly to get more of the hard cockhead barely breaching him into his ass.

“Call me Nordicman, kid,” he said.

Tim’s eyes flew open wide and for a second he and Helm stared at each other. Then Tim grinned a puppyish grin and said, “Okay…yeah…Yeah! Fuck me, Nordicman! Fuck Spiderboy! C’mon!”

Helm grinned a huge, handsome grin and then buried his blunt cock balls-deep into Tim’s ass in one powerful thrust. Tim wailed as his ass opened up around the 8-inch star-cock that cored through him. The young actor thrashed around so much that Evan had to wrap his arms around Tim’s chest, holding his co-star in place as Helm pummeled his tight round ass.

Evan could feel his hot sweat run down his back and he wondered if he would go insane before he could free his trapped cock, which was now uncomfortably squeezed down his rubber-clad leg, pulsing with waves of overwhelming pleasure as it chafed against his costume. Evan’s chest was pressed against Tim’s back, his arms were feeling the flex of Tim’s chest every time he was penetrated, ripples that he felt all the way down to his foam-rubber crotch. And the scent of the sweaty young man he was embracing was almost enough to finish Evan off then and there. Evan would let Tim go and fish out his dick to stop the torture but he felt compelled to keep watching Helm’s full-body strokes up into Tim and the look of hungry sex on Helm’s face. It didn’t seem like anything could break that spell, no matter how much his dick ached.

“Hey, hey Evan,” said Tim practically into Evan’s neck, his words punctuated by Helm’s thick-dick slams up his asshole. He was grinning a huge shit-eating grin. “Check it out. I’m getting hammered by Nordicman. Get it? Hammered??”

“THAT DOES IT,” yelled Evan, pushing the sweaty young man off his chest and into Helm’s arms. Tim whoofed as the sudden movement shoved him deeper down on Helm’s invading rod. Helm wrapped his arms around Tim as Evan transferred Tim to him and kept hunching into the Spiderboy actor, letting the young man wrap his arms around his neck and cover his bearded face with tiny kisses.

Evan wriggled his costume pants down to his knees. His long, 9-inch cock sprang up instantly and Evan tugged on it desperately. He needed–what? He looked at Helm fucking Tim in the air. That was what he needed, to be a part of that snarl of celebrity muscle and cock. Falling to his knees, he scooted up to the rutting pair. Kneeling down, Evan’s face was at just the right height for a view of Tim’s lightly furred, cock-split ass. Evan’s mouth filled with drool again, but this time he could put it to good use. Nosing to where Helm’s fat cock buried itself into Tim’s ass, Evan let his tongue slide up the fat shaft and into Tim’s stretched-out pucker.

Helm bellowed and Tim cooed as they felt the high-grossing action hero’s tongue slide into the tight confines of Tim’s ass. The two male organs in his ass were quickly overwhelming Tim’s system and his short pink dick was smearing precum all over the front of Helm’s costume. Helm, meanwhile, was enjoying the mixture of an assfuck and a blowjob, all while his swinging bull balls hit Evan’s handsome cleft chin with every thrust.

“Oh geez oh geez oh geez,” babbled Tim, his toes flexing in the air as he bounced on Helm’s cock and Evan’s face, “I’m gonna cuuuuuummm…”

“Do it,” growled Helm, not breaking the pace of his thrusts. “Shoot your web, Spiderboy.”

“H-hammer me, Nordicman,” said Tim, squeezing his eyes shut as he felt the cum crest in his balls.

Evan’s tongue was too busy for him to make a pun about his own character, so he just began humming “The Star Spangled Banner” into Tim’s ass.

Tim came first, gripping down hard on Helm’s cock as he wailed and painted Helm’s chest with his hot white load. Helm came a millisecond afterward, deluging the young man’s tight ass with thick fountains of cum. Evan gulped the hot gravy running out of Tim’s ass. Tim and Helm began making out as their bodies were wracked with multiple orgasms, Evan’s handsome face caught between their thighs.

At last Helm slowly lowered Tim into Evan’s waiting arms. The America Man actor pulled the young man into his lap, carefully slotting his hard cock into Tim’s stretched-out, cummy asshole as Tim settled into his lap. He desperately wanted to vigorously plow the young man as vigorously as he had just watched Helm do, but the Spiderboy actor was drowsy and fuck-dazed, leaning his exhausted head against Evan’s. Evan bit his lip, an indulgent look in his eye as he watched his sleepy co-star, and kept up only the slightest roll of his hips as he began a slow and leisurely fuck of Tim’s reamed-out asshole.

Helm beamed down at them and then dropped dramatically to the floor. “Well, fuck,” he said with a lopsided grin. Seconds later he was fast asleep, curled up on the floor, his beefy buttocks and spermy cock bare to the world.

Tim began to giggle when Helm started snoring and Evan smiled contentedly, running his hand through Tim’s sweat-matted hair even while his long cock stirred luxuriously in Tim’s guts. “You’re pretty hot, there, Tim,” he breathed into the young man’s ear."

“Goddamn it,” said Tim with a weary smile, “but I sure do like being in movies with you guys.”

Evan grinned back and closed his eyes, focusing on the heat of Tim’s body and the muscles of his ass that gently gripped Evan’s cock, not even caring that the paparazzi had caught sight of them and we’re rushing over, their cameras flashing.

In his mother’s basement, Eugene kept typing, a scowl set on his face.

–> and THAT is why we should boycott on mass this stupid dreck of a movie and it’s ridiculous, limp-dick political correctness!

The replies were pinging in, but Eugene was too wrapped up in his manifesto to pay attention.

ohgeezman77 fuck has anyone seen the latest pics from the Astounding Boys set??

varletvellum CHESSWORTH FUCKING AMSTERDAM NO LIE there are pictures

boysastoundme jesus what the hell is going on??

Eugene kept typing, hunched and grunting with satisfaction as he made his points. The Reality Enhancement machine, satisfied with its work, whirred and gurgled again. Testing its connection again, it began to follow the words Eugene typed into the website. It was time for another directive. What would Eugene tell it to do next?

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