Recent Comments

2/20/18, 3:25 PM
Oh this was hot. I especially like how he made their lives better. My only thing, why did he have to choose only one. He could have kept both. Hehe
Anonymous
2/20/18, 3:02 PM
Excellent!!
2/20/18, 2:30 PM
Awesome!
Jan 14, 2009
Anonymous
2/20/18, 2:29 PM
I would love for Mark to have survived and where it could lead...
Anonymous
2/20/18, 1:40 PM
hot. please continue
Anonymous
2/20/18, 1:13 PM
hot story. thinking some other kinks, and additions would work nicely into this story
LongtimeFan
2/20/18, 12:47 PM
Hi! This is an EXCELLENT story: I love the descriptions of the gradual brain “washing” (tee hee!), and how you let the reader use their imagination to fill in the gaps of exactly what’s happening. Awesome job! Keep writing! :)
Anonymous
2/20/18, 9:03 AM
very hot!!!
shortnlookn
2/20/18, 3:43 AM
I loved this one, a bit different than most app stories. I would enjoy a sequel if it at all possible. Many apps like that try to get you to recruit friends you know . . .
Martin
2/20/18, 1:55 AM
This site is meant to be a place where to share your fantasies, a place to read abou similar fabtasies and, not least of all, to learn abou writing, getting feedback and getting better at this. Especially if you‘re not a native speaker. writing a story in an interesting, readable and enjoyable way can be really really tough. What works in your own language might not work at all in English, the vocabulary is limited and so on. Still, I want people to continue to write, to improve themselves. Don‘t get discouraged. Don‘t let anyone tell you otherwise. This is your work, you put a lot of effort into it, it‘s your fantasy, yours alone, you decided to share. To all the critiques: Critisicm is fine and welcome. But please mind the tone of your criticism. There‘s no need to offend the writer, ok? Martin