*A shadowy figure sits on a chair, a roaring fire of blue flames behind them. The firelight shows off the massive bulk the figure has, all encased in a slick plaid tweed suit.*
A greeting. We are Meddler Incorporated, a collector of stories and characters of all kinds and genres. We are honored to have the pleasure of introducing you to some of our, shall we say, kinkier stories. *The figure appears to frown* That is, if our blasted author in charge will stop playing with his toys.
*Scene shifts to a chubby guy with black hair and glasses in front of a computer, playing Final Fantasy XIV* "Take that, Lakshmi!"
*The camera goes back to the goon* Of course, if he fails to comply, then we have ways of making him be more...tractable. *He waves a thick hand, rings glittering in the firelight* We have our symbiote hordes, the dominant body suits, and, of course, the hypno-glasses. And that is only a small sample of what we can use on him.
And on you.
*A firm hand lands on your shoulder, and you look around to find an overgrown male figure encased in black rubber looming over you. That smooth, featureless head shows no emotion, but you can somehow tell that is is grinning evilly.*
Do stay a while. We have such sights to show you...