Good Morning, Blokes!

By Hypnothrill published January 11, 2019

It’s the hottest programme on British breakfast telly. Now that the men of the UK have changed a bit…

{It’s my last day of vacation in London, so I’m sharing the first part of my very British new story. Any resemblance to actual British television personalities and celebrities is, I’m sure, purely coincidental. Let me know how you like it in the comments section; I’m especially interested to see if UK and non-UK readers have very different responses.}

Good Morning, Blokes!

Yawning, still bleary-eyed from the night before, Ian walked into the kitchen and brewed up a pot of coffee. Then he poured himself a cup, leaving half a pot left for his flatmate Jamie, who was still asleep. Then he moved over to the range and cooked up some bacon and some baked beans, being extra careful not to let any bacon grease splatter over his naked body.

Then he took his coffee and his brekkie into the sitting room and turned on some morning telly. A familiar face filled the screen: a veteran television personality, Paul Scoville—or “Paul the Silver Fox” as his fans called him. In his mid-50s, Paul was still a very handsome man, and as the camera panned back, Ian could see that Paul was in great shape for a man his age as well. His naked torso was toned and tanned, his belly was flat, and his substantial dick and plump balls hung down below his neatly-trimmed silver pubic hair.

Paul looked straight into the camera and flashed his million-pound smile, “Hello, Great Britain, and welcome to ‘Good Morning, Blokes!’ We’ve got an exciting show for you this morning. Former bandmates Ronnie Walliams and Jerry Berlow will be here to talk about their new partnership. Dr. Alan—you might remember him from Love Island last summer—Dr. Alan will be on the programme to show us some easy and fun ways we can check our health. And then—he’s the thorn in my side, but what would we do without him?—chef Georgio Campano will show us how to get extra protein into our omelets.

Now if you’re from one of the newly acquired Irish territories and you’re just joining us, my former cohost Hayley Weatherbee is now on our Sister Channel, ITV-Fem, with her program ‘Ladies of the Morning.’ My new cohost is, well, he’s really not new, he’s an old friend of the program, Ryan Clair, everyone.”

The camera panned over to the naked man seated beside Paul on the large blue sectional sofa. He looked to be a good 20 years younger than Paul, though his neatly-trimmed beard and mustache made it difficult to pinpoint his exact age. His gelled quiff and carefully sculpted eyebrows completed the gay clone look, which was only underscored by his lean, gym-toned torso, eight-pack abs, and smooth shaven crotch which made his cock look even longer and leaner than it already was.

“Thank you, Paul!” Ryan smiled back at him, “And can I just say how good you’ve been looking recently? Grrr…get it daddy!” Ryan said, laughing at his own joke.

“Why thank you, Ryan,” Paul responded, blushing a bit. “You know, honestly, I’d been letting myself go a little bit. I’d figured, well, as long as I don’t have a belly hanging over my belt when I’m on telly, I’m fine. And well, this was back when I was still with my wife, and she actually liked a bit of ‘dad bod,’ that’s what she called it, my ‘dad bod.’

But ever since I had my re-education, I realized that just simply wasn’t good enough. Not if I wanted to get with handsome young blokes like you. And, alright, maybe I’d be able to pull a few of them just because I’m a celebrity who they recognize from the telly, but I wanted them to want me for my body. So I’ve been hitting the gym every day for the past couple of weeks, trying to make myself look a bit more fuckable.”

Ryan appeared a bit misty-eyed as he looked into the camera, “Wow, your story really is an inspiration to all the older men out there watching us. See, you can do it! You can make yourself totally fuckable, just like Paul did. I know I’d fuck you, Paul.”

“If I recall, Ryan, you already have.”

The two men laughed, and watching at home, Ian chuckled along with them.

Then Paul got a more serious look on his face as he looked into the camera, “Our first guests this morning are at the centre of a controversy on social media. Craig Johnson is a dairy farmer from Kent who has been harassed on Facebook by vegan activists. Jay Carsten is one of those activists, and we’ve brought them both on the program today to discuss their views.”

The camera panned over to show two more men sitting further down the sectional sofa, an awkwardly large gap between them. Both men looked like they were in their early 30s, but it was easy enough to pick out which one was Craig the dairy farmer and which one was Jay the activist. Craig was the one who was totally naked except for a pair of Wellies. He had straw-blond hair, a ruddy complexion, a light dusting of hair on his chest and conservatively trimmed pubic hair over his thick dick and low-hanging bollocks. Jay had long black hair tied back in a ponytail, plus a hairy chest, armpits, and a untrimmed bush of pubes that grew wild around his long cock. And all he wore was a pair of Doc Martens.

“Craig, Jay, thanks for both being on the program this morning. Now, Craig, can you tell us why you were harassed on Facebook?” Paul asked gently.

“Um…well…” Craig stammered a bit, visibly nervous. “Well… one of our heifers had just given birth to triplets and…”

“Can I just stop you there, Craig?” Ryan interrupted. “So you live all alone out there on the farm, all by your lonesome, do you? That must be tough. How do you find enough men to fuck out there?”

“Well…I…I only just finished the process last week and…well…I’ve fucked a few blokes so far… My brother-in-law… a few of my mates down at the village pub…”

Ryan raised a sculpted eyebrow, “Just a few?! Well, that’s not enough!” He turned to the other guest on the couch, “Jay, don’t you think that Craig here needs to fuck some more men?”

The vegan activist cleared his throat, then spoke quickly in a nasal Australian accent. “Well, I can’t really speak to that, Ryan. What I can say is that what goes on in these dairy farms is absolutely wrong and utterly unethical. The cattle are forcibly inseminated. Do you hear that, Ryan? Forcibly inseminated! And…”

“Oh, I do hear that, Jay,” Ryan responded cheerfully as he cut off his guest, “And that sounds pretty hot to me: forcibly inseminated. Doesn’t that sound hot to you, Jay? Wouldn’t you like to be forcibly inseminated by Craig here? Wouldn’t you like him to mount you and empty those big bull balls of his inside of you? And I bet you’d like that too, Craig. You need to fuck more men, and Jay here looks like he’d be a great fuck!”

“No…I…” “That’s not what…”

Craig and Jay each protested weakly, but their rising dicks gave them away. Ryan pressed the point even further, “Come on, lads. Remember, you’re both subjects of the Crown. You know what that means.”

In unison, Craig and Jay both flatly repeated, “I am a subject of the Crown. I was made to fuck and be fucked by men,” as their dicks grew fully erect.

Watching at home, Ian set down his coffee and gave his hard dick a few nice long strokes as he repeated along, “I am a subject of the Crown. I was made to fuck and be fucked by men.”

Meanwhile, on the screen, Jay laid down on the sofa with his legs up in the air while Craig prepared to mount him. Right before the moment of penetration, the camera cut away to a sheepish-looking Paul. “Well, as you all know, we can’t show intercourse before the 8 PM Watershed hour,” he said, raising his voice to be heard over Craig’s grunts and Jay’s moans, “So perhaps now would be a good time to take an advert break.”

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