Becoming His Pet, Part III
By Erik East published October 12, 2013
SummaryTwo roommates surprise each other with their secrets
A big thank you to MonsterMash62, who gave many hours of invaluable feedback and editing.
This is a story primarily about control and submission--particularly mind control; and, secondarily, about sex.
Please favor me with comments of any sorts.
Chapter 12: Turned inside out
It was after ten when Evan dropped Benj at home. Not so late for college, but late for the farm. Having been up since five that morning, Benj should have been tired enough; instead, he was bursting with energy.
He kept going over what Evan had told him. It was all so incredible, but what was amazing--Benj saw it himself--wasn't the part about pheromones and telepathy. He'd adjusted as best he could to that already. It was Evan *himself!* All Benj could think about was, *what a man!* What an astonishing, fantastic *man* Evan was!
The more he thought about it, the more keyed up he got. And no matter what Benj did, he couldn't *not* think about it. He could barely brush his teeth--he was talking to himself in the mirror the whole time. He got into bed, and tried to put his thoughts aside, but he couldn't. He kept going through all Evan's qualities: "hes so strong...He's so sure of himself! He's helped me so much this year--where would I be without him? He's so *powerful*...I trust him *so much!*" Benjs mind was racing. Finally, he blurted out, "I can't believe I have a friend like that!" Surprised at just how loud he'd said it, Benj turned over and tried to get to sleep, but to no avail. Finally he jumped out of bed.
He was shaking. He tried to hold himself still, but he couldn't. It had hit him: the terrifying thought that, somehow, the madness he'd felt just weeks ago had returned!
He tried to slow his breathing, tried to calm himself, not making a sound. As he stood there, he turned his ear inward, trying to "hear" what his body and his heart were saying. As he focused in, it dawned on him that one thing was different: he wasn't getting an erection. Whatever was stirring him up, it wasn't that. Plus: Evan had told him, in no uncertain terms, that he was *all clear.*
But what was it? What was happening to him?
Benj stood as still as he could for what seemed like forever. He heard the night frogs give their soothing chorus. Far away in the night, he could just make out the sound of a train chugging. Everything was so still. He felt his heart beating, perfectly normally.
"What is this?" he finally whispered, not wanting to shatter the quiet. "I'm not...in pain; I'm...not worried--nothing bad is happening to me! I...everything is peaceful around me; this is wonderful. I'm not...I'm not...I'm not *afraid*--am I? What's going on?!?"
Then the words came into his head: Evan loves me!
That felt good; real good. Benjamin smiled--he was glad Evan loved him. He was grateful. But...but what? *What?*
"Why didn't I let Evan fix me tonight?"
Benj stood still, as if waiting for the night to answer. Finally, he heard the answer inside him:
"Because then what?"
That's when Benj felt it: a deep pang of...something dark. Fear. Sadness. But this wasn't the insanity of a few weeks before. He was calm now; he possessed himself.
And something was wrong. No, something was *missing.*
Benj balled his hands in tight fists and was about to cry out when he remembered his parents were sleeping a few feet away. So he tore down the stairs, as fast as he could, and raced out the back yard. He kept running till he got well away from the house, near the pasture. Finally, panting, he threw himself against the rail fence. He still didn't dare yell--he feared he would wake the entire county.
He started interrogating himself: "what are you saying? You want to be with him?" A sudden uplift in his heart was his answer.
"This is crazy--you're in love with him--and you don't..." he looked down at his crotch-- "you don't *feel* it." Then a realization stunned him. No, he wasn't turned on by Evan. There was nothing. But somehow, he knew there *could* be. It was like a piece of fruit, hanging in front of him. He only had to...reach out...
"Oh, this is so fucked u-u-u-up!!!"
So it went for a while. How long, Benj had no idea; he just kept stomping around the yard, trying to wear himself out, only to start all over again.
"I don't even know who I am! Am I Ben'?" He paused; and shook his head to realize that suddenly, that didn't feel right. "Benjamin?" Shaking his head again. "Benj? *Benji?*" No one besides Evan had ever called him Benji, even when he was a boy. And yet now, that sounded more and more right. Why?
Finally, exhaustion finally overtaking his determination, he turned slowly back to the house and climbed up the stairs. He paused when he thought he heard someone stir in his parent's room. Not hearing anything else, he crept back to his bedroom. He crawled back into bed.
When he heard his dad banging on his door the next morning, Benj's first thought was gratitude--he thought he'd never fall asleep. But it hadn't been long enough. Getting the cows going with their milking, shoveling out the silage, helping his dad work on the equipment; it was all too much. He tried to keep himself energetic, but it was hard.
"What's wrong, son?"
"Sorry dad, I just had a bad night--didn't sleep much."
"I already know that, Ben. The question is why."
"I dunno, dad; I...just have something on my mind."
Mr. Pritchard stopped and fixed his brown eyes on his son.
Jake Pritchard was 55. When he met Linda in high school, he was an athlete like Ben, but in football. He wasn't really tall enough or quick enough for the prestige positions, but he had made a pretty good lineman. With his square, solid build, that position had been a good fit for him. His sandy hair had gotten thinner since then, but his weight hadn't changed much. Working the farm he'd taken over from his retired parents when he graduated college had kept him in good shape.
"Is it a girl?" He asked his son.
Benj laughed ruefully. "I wish! No, dad, it's not a girl."
"C'mon son, do you think I don't remember being 19? Some girl broke your heart. Believe me, I know that feeling."
"Dad, I know...but that's not it. It's really not."
"Fine. What is it then? Tell me!"
"It's...it's hard, I don't even know, really, how to..."
"There's nothing you can't tell me, Ben. Nothing."
Benj smiled. That felt really good. Something was the same--something clicked. It was...love.
"Dad--thank you! But...it's not because I'm afraid to tell you, because I'm not. It's that *I don't know what to tell you.* It's just something so big, I can't get a handle on it. It's...it's about...me--life--where I fit--where I'm headed. I dunno."
"Are you worried about your future? Don't be, Ben. You have everything ahead of you. You have people who love you. You're bright, you're healthy, you're good looking--you've got everything, right in front of you!"
Continuing, he added, "you did really well this year--you made dean's list, don't you realize that? What are you afraid of?"
"That's just it, dad--I'm not *afraid,* exactly. I mean, you're right, it's right there, all I have to do is reach out..." Benj extended his hand, as if to pluck something out of the air--only to suddenly pull back.
"Dad, what if my future isn't anything like what you would expect? What you had in mind for me?"
"Son, if you're thinking about this farm--as much as I'd love you to take it over, that has to be something you want. It can't just be because I want it."
"I don't mean the *farm,* dad. I mean...well, everything! What if *I* don't turn out the way you want?"
Mr. Pritchard stepped close to Benjamin, put his hands on his son's shoulders and looked squarely at him. "Ben, it's too late for that. You've already turned out the way I wanted."
Benj felt his dad's hands on his shoulders. It felt good--*really* good. Something clicked again.
"But dad, what if...what if I choose a path...not the wrong' path, but one everyone else thinks is wrong? Even if I think it's right?"
Mr. Pritchard squeezed his son's shoulders before he let go, then wiped his hands down across his face--which is what he did when he was trying to get through a problem. He wished his son would say more about his dilemma, but...
"Son, I don't know what this is all about. I wish you'd just say it outright, but--I know what it is to have to make a decision, and feel alone, because it's *your* decision--and it has to be yours. Just yours." He let out a small sigh before continuing.
"Whatever this is, it can't be for me, or your mom, or your family, or anyone else."
"No one else, dad?"
"Well...eventually you'll want to share your life. And no longer have it be just *yours.* Then, it's not just you. But when that happens, whenever it happens, then, yes, it's about that other person. And when *love* happens..."
"I'm afraid of losing myself, dad!"
Mr. Pritchard nodded. "That's right. Because that's what happens--you lose yourself. But if you try to hang onto yourself, then you'll be alone."
"But what if--what if you don't know what that self' is? What *you* are?"
"Son, that's what the other person helps you find! She'll complete you, son! That's how you'll know: when you realize that without that other person, something's missing--something's not right."
When Benj didn't say anything else, his dad put his arm around his son's shoulder and asked, "feel better?"
"A lot dad--thanks!" With a slap on his son's back, Mr. Pritchard replied: "Good--then let's get back to it."
They worked together on the combine for about an hour. Mr. Pritchard could see that Benj *was* feeling better, but he was obviously still pretty tired. He told his son to knock off. "Why don't you get a nap in before lunch?"
"You sure, dad?"
"Sure--you can make it up to me later this week, OK?"
"You got it!" Benj sighed deeply as he started back to the house. It was about 8:30, and he could get in a good three hour nap before lunch. And when his head hit the pillow, he was out like a light.
Soon he was dreaming. He was back in high school, wrestling again. First he was winning, then--he was struggling. He couldn't get back on top, no matter how hard he tried. People were jeering; he was embarrassed and ashamed. No matter what he did...the other wrestler, he was so much bigger; he was tall, muscular. Benj was flipped around, then he was facing the other wrestler. Then, they were...embracing!
It didn't hurt. He looked up: it was Evan! Evan was holding him! "Just relax, son, don't fight anymore!" The crowd quieted and Benj was flipped again, onto his stomach this time. Evan was on top of him now. Benj didn't fight, he just gave in. It was so much easier.
He could hear people cheering and he realized it was everyone he knew: his family, his swim team, his friends from high school. Trevor was there--he was wearing a skin-tight wrestling singlet, just like in high school. He was smiling at Benj with his usual brilliant smile. Everyone seemed so happy with what they saw. But it all faded; he didn't care about that.
He felt Evan's strong body wrapped around him, holding him tight, controlling him. He couldn't move on his own, but it didn't hurt, so he didn't care. It was all right, he felt good, safe.
Evan drew up close to him and was right on top of him. He felt Evan right there, against his rear, pressing down, pressing against him, between...he knew what was happening and he pushed himself back against Evan. Suddenly...unnhhhhh!
Benj woke up in a sweat. His body was still spasming. He was face down on the bed, thrusting against the mattress as he felt his penis firing, again, again, again. But he was so tired, he quickly sank back into a dream state even before his orgasm ended.
It was dark now. Benj didn't know where he was. He was on a street, dark and deserted. He was walking. Noises, movement in the shadows. He was becoming afraid. With every step, his terror increased. He turned around again--suddenly, he could see--and no one was there. He could see for miles and there was no one in sight.
He was so afraid, he called out. But no one answered.
Benj looked down. He was at the pool now, in his Speedo. Just like the rest of the swim team. Wait, where were they? They were all gone. He was alone.
He started walking, and found himself in a mall. No one was--no, he wasn't alone here. There were shoppers here. But what were they shopping for? He looked past some people who were gathered by a display...
The display was a girl--and he knew her! It was Laura, from school. She was standing there and people were looking at her. No, wait: were they... bidding? They were trying to get her, but she didn't seem happy about it. She looked at Benj, pleading. She wanted him to take her; to save her. But he pulled back. It didn't feel right! No!
He started walking again, and saw more of the same. He saw Evan's friends Andrew and Zak. Andrew had already taken Zak down from a display case similar to Laura's. Zak crouched down now, beside Andrew. Andrew started walking--he was leading Zak! On all fours! And Zak was so happy. Benj watched Zak. He felt happy along with Zak...and for a moment, he was Zak...
He looked again, and saw Evan's other friend, Jason. And there was Carrie, on the platform, like the others. Jason was talking to her, but nothing happened. Then he saw Jason turn around. Someone had walked up to him. It was another man. From the back, he looked like Evan, but it wasn't Evan. He grabbed Jason. Jason struggled, but the man was stronger, and before long, he'd pushed Jason up onto the platform, next to Carrie. Jason struggled, but slowly stopped. The man nodded his approval and Jason smiled and became calmer. Someone else claimed Carrie, and as she was led away, Benj called out, "Jason, what are you doing?"
"It doesn't matter. This is all that matters." Then Jason fell silent and stood still, as he gazed up at the man who stood over him--and then let himself be led away.
Then Benj was standing in front of the platform himself. People were gathering. No women, just men. He knew he had to step up, and he did. He turned to face the crowd. They were staring at him, wanting him. It was strange, yet he felt good. He wanted to be there, yet he wanted someone to come. He looked at the men, but he didn't recognize anyone, so he waited. But no one came for him.
He was at the pool again now. No, a diving board. High, higher. And he was alone again. He was scared. He had to jump but it was impossible! He couldn't even see below. If he jumped, he would die!
Yet for some reason he had to. He was panicking, he was going to die and couldn't do anything about it...
It was Evan! He saw Evan, with his wavy dark hair, his confident smile, standing just below. However far it was, there was Evan. Evan, so strong, his muscular arms spread out, and Benj wasn't afraid anymore. He knew he could jump, and Evan would catch him! Behind him, someone said, "you have to go, you have to jump, you have to..."
He was falling, falling...for a moment, forever--till Evan caught him! Evan held him, his arms big and strong enough to hold him. And suddenly Benj was so small, being cradled in Evan's arms. He wasn't wearing a Speedo anymore; he wasn't wearing anything. But it didn't matter, Evan was holding him and he was safe! "Safe and secure from all alarm"...
Evan's bare, muscled arms held him, his hand gently petting Benj. Evan gently set him down on a huge, soft bed. Benj looked up, and Evan was leaning over him. He pulled Benj to his chest. "Shh, don't be afraid," he said. Benj snuggled close, feeling Evans warmth. He turned his face to Evan's chest and Evan's nipple was there. It was the most natural thing to slip it into his mouth, and just...suck. Benj suckled, and he was being nourished! It grew in his mouth, it was larger, longer, very firm, hard, alive, powerful, deep in his mouth, in his throat. He realized what he was really suckling on, but didnt care. Evan was rocking his head, gently yet firmly holding him tight, and Benj sucked like a baby on a bottle. Sweet richness filled his mouth, and he kept swallowing, kept swallowing. This was all he wanted...he was so happy!
Benj woke up, this time on his back. He'd kicked off his sheets, and for a moment, he thought he was naked. His head was way back, his mouth was open and he was gasping as his body convulsed. He was in the middle of another intense orgasm, and his cock, pulsing in the cool air, was shooting volleys of semen all over his heaving chest and abdomen.
As the climax faded, for a moment Benj wondered why he was naked--he knew he'd been wearing boxers when he lay down. Then he realized he still was, but his penis was sticking out the fly. He realized he was more than half still in the dream, where he *had* been naked. And he could feel the dream fading. Yet if he wanted, he could fall back in. He hesitated; stay or go?
He kept his eyes closed, and was drawn back into the dream; it made him feel so good. Yet he was stretching his body, the way he would as he woke up--that felt good, too. He drew his hand down across his face and he felt something thick and wet, right near his mouth. Without thinking, he'd pushed it into his mouth. He savored it, and swallowed it. He was on the threshold between dream and awake, and he relaxed, sinking back...
"Evan..." he moaned.
"Benji!" he heard in Evan's voice.
He was awake now, and that was definitely a different voice. It was followed by a sharp knock on his door.
"Mom! I'm coming! Don't come in, I'm not dressed!" Quickly sorting things, he tried to tuck himself into his boxers, but as he was still throbbing, it popped out again.
"Get a move on, honey! We're sitting down in ten minutes."
"Yes ma'am." Benj sat up, his head and emotions reeling from what he'd just gone through. He remembered it all. Some of it was unclear; but what he'd been doing, that made him climax so powerfully, not once but twice--that was crystal clear. He hadn't had a wet dream since he was 13. In a strange, but a not terribly unpleasant way, he felt very much like a boy again.
Yes, he knew: it had been his own semen he'd pushed into his mouth. He'd never done that. And he knew whose he thought it was when he did it. Just then, his erection roared back.
"Gotta get moving." He jumped up. The bathroom was down the hall, but he was in no shape to go outside his room. He grabbed the t-shirt he'd worn that morning and used it to clean himself up. He was covered in sweat, but had no time for a shower. He mopped himself up a bit and threw on a clean t-shirt. He shucked off his boxers and pulled on some gym shorts. That'd do for lunch...
Except for that, he thought, looking down at his erection. He opened a drawer and found a jockstrap. He shucked off his shorts, pulled it on, and pulled up his shorts when he heard his brother yelling upstairs for him. His problem wasn't exactly solved, but it was tamed.
"How'd you sleep, Ben?" his mom asked, concerned. "You couldn't sleep last night honey?"
"No ma'am, but--I slept great this morning! Thanks dad!"
His dad chuckled. "Looks like it worked, from the way you bounded down those stairs."
"I feel it, dad--I feel totally new!"
"Good timing, champ," his brother Alex chimed in-- "now that the chores are done, and all you gotta worry about is getting a tan at the swim club!"
Benj shrugged. "What can I say? My job's awesome."--prompting his older brother to punch his shoulder.
Chapter 13: Sorting things out
After lunch, Benj excused himself to get ready for his pool job. Since he didn't have a car, either he'd have to catch a ride from one of the other kids working at the pool, borrow his dad's truck, or rely on someone from home to drive him. He could usually catch a ride home, either right after his shift, or else later--giving him an excuse to hang by the pool.
Since Alex was driving into town anyway, he offered his kid brother a lift.
"So what's with you, kid? You come home, mooning about a girl or something; you don't talk much to your family, your friends, anyone; last night you're up all night, pacing the floor; now you're ready to take on the world! And," glancing over at his brother's lap, "I don't know what you're thinking about Benj, but it isn't milking the cows."
He grinned but he wasnt all that embarrassed. His parents hadn't been prudes about sex, they just tried to instill good values; so growing up with three older brothers, there was plenty of joking and open talk about sexual matters. This wasn't the first time one of the Pritchard boys caught another with an erection. It was a little embarrassing, but that's all. He was still feeling too much euphoria from his morning nap.
Looking over at Alex, Benj saw the family resemblance, but not as strongly as so many others did. As far as everyone Benj knew was concerned, the four brothers were almost carbon copies. But not quite; the oldest, Buck, was starting to get a stomach after three years of marriage and working at a desk job; his hair was brown, as was Alex's, rather than blond like second brother Chris and Benj himself.
Alex was a fit as Benj--working on the farm with their dad had that effect; plus Alex biked a fair amount and occasionally lifted weights, as their dad did. As a result, he had pretty strong legs, but also a set of respectable guns and a decent chest. All the Pritchard men tended to have only a little hair on their chests. Alex's face, however, was a different story; he'd been trying to develop a beard, and found a goatee worked about the best for him. He also wore his hair longer than his brothers. He was considered the "liberal" of the family.
"So who is this girl?" Alex demanded.
"Whoever it is whose turning you into a nutball."
"Alex, there's no girl; I told dad, I'm telling you. I've just been...sorting things out."
"All right--I have to admit, you're a lot better company lately, than you were a few weeks ago. Dad said you and he had a good talk; he was worried about you bro--we all were."
"Thanks, big brother."
"No problem. It's good to have you home. And if you need something, if I can help...just say so, OK?"
"Thanks. Look, I...I'm still sorting out some things; I don't want to make it into something huge, but: I'm just thinking about *life*; and maybe what I want, and what I need, is something totally a surprise? Does that make any sense?"
"Depends on the surprise.' What, are you planning to become a missionary or something? Join the military? Become a monk who goes off to a mountaintop?"
"No--but what if I did? What if I wanted to do something everyone thought was crazy? That no one expected?"
"On why you're doing it."
"I didn't say I--"
"Shut up! Something's up, don't tell me otherwise. As far as what? I trust you'll tell me when the time is right.
"Now answer my question: why are you doing it--whatever this crazy thing is?"
Benj thought about it. Then he started his answer three times before he could get the right words.
"It's scary--crazy--but somehow, I know it'll give me something I don't have now."
"My right place. Where I fit. The true me."
"Ben, I just have two questions. First: is there love?"
Benj inhaled sharply. "Oh yes. Lots of love."
Alex nodded. "And second, will you be happy?"
Benj paused, then closing and opening his eyes as he thought about it, he nodded vigorously.
Alex reached over and squeezed his brother's shoulder. "Well, then, little brother, that's all that matters, isn't it?" Then he made a show of nodding down at his brother's lap. "Well, looks like someone's happy."
"Shut up!" Benj said, laughing, as he playfully shoved his brother.
Unlike his morning, Benj had plenty of energy at the pool. The various tasks were pretty mindless, allowing him time to think about all that'd happened. This was one time, however, he could use some distraction; because the vivid memories of his dreams kept stirring him up down below, and it wouldn't do if he was tenting his shorts when he was supposed to be minding the kids in the pool.
So he was actually thankful when several of the kids got into a fight in the pool. That, and a trip to the locker room for a cold shower, kept him in line.
About then, while scanning the pool, Benj felt someone kick his lifeguard chair. "Hey, bonehead!" Startled, he looked down to find Trevor. He wasn't smiling.
"Hey buddy--glad to see you."
"Really? That's news."
Benj was a little puzzled. What was that about? He thought after his pissy first couple of weeks, things were getting more normal with Trevor.
"What are you talking about?" Benj said, pausing to whistle and gesture at some boys who were being a little rough with each other.
"Well, how about last night for one? Remember, we were going to get together? I came over here to get you, only to find out you'd taken off. Nobody knew where you'd gone."
"What? Aw, shit..." Suddenly Benj remembered. How had he screwed that up? "I'm sorry man, I--I blew it, I completely forgot. You know how that is, don't you?"
"Yeah, except I texted you about an hour before; I don't get that."
"Aw, I'm really sorry," Benj stalled. He realized Trevor was going to keep pressing for more explanation--and he didn't blame him. He'd been holding Trevor at arm's length ever since he got back from school.
"Anyway, why didn't you call me?"
"I did, bro--a bunch of times. Called and texted. You never answered."
"What?" Benj reached for his phone, only to realize it wasn't on the seat next to him. His mind started racing; he realized he couldn't remember when he had it last. Now, in addition to realizing he'd screwed up a lot worse with Trevor than he realized, he now had to worry about his phone. He thought of Evan--and wondered if he'd missed any calls or texts from him.
He scrambled down the ladder, glanced again around the pool, then turned to Trevor.
"Buddy, I am totally sorry. I know I've been a real jerk lately. I've had a lot on my mind and--well, I feel bad because in the past, you'd have been the one person I knew I could talk to.
"Look, I--I need to..." his voice trailed off; he wasn't sure what to say next. He needed to talk to Trevor; he wanted to. He wanted to talk to him about all this, but he didn't know where to begin; standing in the middle of the swim club, while on lifeguard duty, with plans for the evening that he really didn't want to explain...and a missing phone...it was all too much.
"...I need to do like ten things right now, including talk to you about all that's been happening. It's been crazy, and the truth is, so crazy I didn't know how to talk about it."
Trevor softened. "I gotcha--so let's go somewhere after you get off--aren't you finished in a few?"
"Yeah, but that's the thing; I've got plans; and now, I'm wondering where my cell is. I'm betting I left it here yesterday. That's why I didn't get your calls."
Trevor was frustrated--but he was pretty good at reading his friend, and there was no denying Benji was wrestling with something huge. After Benj turned and barked some orders at a group of kids that had ignored his whistle twice, Trevor grabbed him by both shoulders and made him look at him.
"All right. I accept your apology, because basically you are pretty much lost if I'm not there to walk you through life. But I don't accept you not telling me about all this. I'm you're fucking best friend, Ben. So you *are* going to talk to me. Go do your thing tonight--your date, or whatever--but I own you tomorrow; you got that, sidekick?"
"Thanks man. I promise. But--look, I'm sorry, but I really have to find my phone. I'm hoping it got turned in at the office."
"Relax, pool boy; you need to stay here. I'll go see if they have your phone."
Benji did relax. "Thanks man, you're a lifesaver!"
Trevor grinned and messed Benj's hair. "See? Even that I do better than you!" Benj watched as Trevor sprinted over to the office; and a minute or so later, he saw him coming back with it, with his usual superior look on his face. As Trevor was handing it to Benj, it started vibrating.
"Batman saves the day again. There you go, Robin."
Benj mumbled a quick thanks as he fumbled to see who was calling. It turned out to be a text from Evan, saying he was on his way. He noticed it was almost 5, and quickly texted back that hed need to get a shower and dress--did he want to come a little later? "No, I can wait for you there."
Trevor grinned as he observed his friend's obvious excitement; he had no doubt, now, that it was a date. Hed figured on hanging with Ben by the pool, but since hed already changed into his swim trunks, he figured hed just find a spot to catch some rays, and wait till tomorrow to drill his best friend on all that was turning him inside-out lately.
When Benj climbed down and headed toward the clubhouse--the locker rooms were on the lower level--he was surprised to see Evan standing there!
"Hey, I thought Id see you outside."
"I wanted to stretch my legs. You dont mind?"
"No--just give me a few."
Benj raced through showering, shaving and getting dressed. When he came out, he was wearing neatly pressed khaki trousers, some loafers, and a pressed Oxford shirt.
Evan took notice of Benjs dressy appearance, and as they walked to his car he asked, "Whats this all about?"
"I just wanted to celebrate--last night, I think we were both pretty tense. Its been a rough few weeks. Now thats all over. Isnt that reason to celebrate?"
"It is. And I cant tell you how glad I am to hear you talk that way!"
Since Benj wanted to celebrate, Evan drove down to Yuba City, where there were a number of restaurants at the interchange. The Don Pablo's looked the most promising. Somehow--Benj suspected he knew--Evan managed to get margaritas for both of them without either being carded.
"Heres to you, Benj," Evan toasted; "Heres to you, back to yourself; heres to us, back to being friends!"
Benj joined the toast and drank deep. It wasnt his first margarita.
Evan smiled, shaking his head. "Ill say it again: I cant tell you how happy I am to see you like this. I...I was very concerned for you. All I want is just to see you happy. Have a good summer, and then well be back together at school again."
"What do you think, Evan, do you want to be roommates again next fall?"
"Sure--what about you?"
"Absolutely! Except for that last part--" Benj smiled for Evans sake--"it was awesome. I loved being your roommate, Evan. Thanks. I'd love to do it again."
"I feel the same way, Benj--I loved having you. We had a great time."
"Well, but just one thing. You know: we have to take care of that one thing."
"You mean, do that thing you do with my head."
But, Evan--" Benj turned to face Evan and look him straight in the eye. "There's something you haven't considered."
"What? What's that?"
"That maybe, I don't want any protection."
"What? But I explained that. You need it."
"Benj, we talked about this. Without it, I can't be sure you won't fall under my spell again."
"Right--and, that assumes something..."
Evan stared, not comprehending.
"...that, even without the pheromones and all that, maybe I still...want to be...Yours."
Evan was stunned. "What? But...how? I don't understand! You're straight!"
"That's right. But it doesn't mean I can't love You."
"Wait, Benj, you're..."
"I'm what? Under Your influence? You said I'm clear. Am I?"
Evan paused and read' Benj again--sensing correctly that Benj wanted him to. "Youre right. There's no question this isn't the pheromones."
"So what's wrong?"
"Benj--I...I don't know if you realize what you're saying. I'm not talking about friendship now. I'm talking about, well--my People call it mating. You would call it being lovers. Being in love. Being married."
"I do understand that. I'm in love with You. I don't know how, but I know that I am. I want to *be* with You. Not because I have to; because I *want* to."
"This is incredible! You feel that way for me? You're straight, Benj. Without the pheromones, changing you, how can this be?"
Benj laughed. "Are you asking, do you give me a hard-on! Uh, *yeah!* Right now, as a matter of fact! Don't you feel that same way about me?"
"Oh g-d yes!" Evan started to reach for Benj, then hesitated. "That's not enough; I want you to hear you explain this. You're not gay; yet you want to be with a man. With *me!* Sexually. How do you explain this to yourself?
"Evan, one day I didn't want it; the next day, I did. When I realized that what I wanted, above all, was *You!* Even more, I wanted what you wanted: to possess me. I want that, Evan. I know that now: *that's all I want!* And wanting that, made me want all the rest of it--the rest of you--every bit of you."
"Benji, will you allow me, now, to enter your mind?"
Evan pushed in gently, and once in, He softly reached to examine Benj's feelings. They were quivering and raw--but they were genuine. Just as gently, Evan withdrew.
After a moment absorbing all this, Evan lurched forward and took Benj's face in his hands, pulling his lips to his own. After a long, passionate kiss, Evan remembered where he was; he pulled back, and just pondered Benj's joyful face.
"This is unbelievable! This is so perfect--but I have to make sure. For your sake--and for my peace of mind--you have to know all that this means. It's more than you can imagine."
"So, tell me."
"Benji, there's more about my People than I've told you. There isn't time to tell our whole history now; but there are things about us you can't imagine. You already know we have gifts most people don't.
"You know that when we mate, it's not the way most people do. No need for dating, or courtship--just an instinct; a function of nature. The truth is, the only reason most of us go through dating and courtship rituals is to blend in.
"When we find a mate, it's not an equal relationship. It's not marriage in that sense at all--even if we do marry for appearances sake. You need to understand that. I'll take you; you won't take me. You submit. There's no equality; even if I wanted to, it would be impossible--because you, your will, can't withstand me. You can't stop me; you can't resist; and you won't want to.
"You realize, that's what almost happened to you?"
"Yes. Go on."
As Evan talked, something about him changed. The usual friendliness was giving way to kind of ferocity. A power was being unveiled. If Benj didnt know he could trust Evan, he would have been very frightened.
"If I take you as my mate, the first time I mount you, I will change you. My Seed will work its will on you; you cant do anything about it. Your body will change in many ways. Nothing bad, but it will happen and you cant stop it. It will change your life in many ways. After that, youll need me in a way you cant fully understand now; but it will be real. I mean it literally: without me, you'll die.
"You think you've experienced the power of my pheromones. That was only a slight taste. Imagine a drop of water, versus a lake, an ocean. You cannot imagine what will happen when you feel their full force.
Imagine if that were all you breathed..."
"Oh g-d, Evan, stop..."
He waited for Benj to cool a little. "Can you hear more, Benji?"
"You realize you won't have an independent life? You won't be able to think or act apart from what I allow. You will, in every way, *belong* to Me. You'll be an extension of me. My boy. My property. My pet. That's how our People are. That's our world.
"Make no mistake: I'd love you as much as any Man# can love his boy. But this is a one-way road, Benj. Are you sure this is what you want?
"This next step, Benji, once you yield, you won't be able to go back. I could let you go; but once you yield, even a little, you'll lose the ability to pull away.
"And after this, we're not friends'; that's gone forever. Right now, you can still go back; I could wipe all this from your memory..."
"No, please! No!"
Benj had to take a couple of breaths to calm himself before he could speak. As he did, he contemplated the artistry of Evan's face. When he was in his fever, all his desire was directed at Evan's pants; now it was different. He considered how clear and fresh Evan' taut skin was; he sighed over the chiseled jaw; lips that begged to be nibbled and kissed; the dazzling smile; the elegance of his nose and ears; the rich, manly stubble that darkened his chin and cheeks; the dark soft curls on Evan's head that Benj had yet to caress; and above all, the deep, azure wells of his eyes that Benj ached to have swallow him whole.
"Evan, don't You see? This--all this--is what I want!
"Looking back, there were times during the year, when I felt it--but I didn't know what it was. But I know now. Now I know why I didn't mind cleaning up after you and doing your laundry.
"I know why I wanted to be your roommate, all the way back at the beginning of the year. It wasn't sexual; but there was something I needed; and you gave it to me.
"You told me that you thought you knew why I fell so hard for you? Why your pheromones hit me so hard? What did you say?
"I didn't, Benji."
"That's right. So let me guess. It's because some people--some men...some males--are easier to catch; am I right?
Evan was impressed. "That's right."
"And I'm one of them.
"Yes, Benji, you are.
"You asked me if i# want this. But another question occurs to me: do i *need* this?"
"I think i do. But if i'm right--the answer can't really come from me, right?"
Evan nodded. "Yes--that's right. A sub--a boy--doesn't make decisions; when he tries, he's just playing being a Man. And that makes him incomplete. A Man completes a boy, and gives him his meaning.
"So, am i right about myself? What am i, Evan? Tell me the truth!"
"You're a boy, Benji."
"Not a man."
"You're welcome boy."
Benji paused to take this all in; his world had just turned on its axis. And as disorienting as that was, he was growing utterly certain that his world was, finally, oriented the right way.
"Then you are boy' now; you always have been--no more denial. You are inferior. You always were--but now no more pretending. You have no rights or claims as far as I am concerned. I don't need your permission for anything. You understand, *Benji?*" Evan pressed deep into Benj's mind to demonstrate what he meant.
Feeling Evans strength pressing hard into his consciousness made Benj shudder and gasp. "Yes. Sir."
"From this point, I own you, boy. I haven't made you My mate; but now, you are My property."
"I make all decisions about you from now on. Even if I let you make some, for My convenience, never forget what you are, boy. There will be many ways I will help you adjust to this during the coming months.
"Everything that you have owned, belongs to Me, boy. I have no interest in stuff--it's just that you need to understand that you no longer own--you *are* owned.
"Everything you thought you owned a moment ago, is now Mine. Even if I let you keep it, or use it, it's *Mine.*"
Benj was only somewhat hearing all Evan said. It was all outshone by the burst of certainty that Benj felt at that moment: he belonged with Evan. Evan meant joy. Evan equaled meaning. This was right!
But the rest of what "this" was? Evan's words about serving Him, belonging to Him, being His property...calling Him "Sir": he would sort that out. At the moment, his surging joy overwhelmed the whispers of qualms in his mind and heart.
"Yes, Sir, oh yes! Please, Sir!
Evan reached out and gently stroked Benj's face. "Good boy!"
"Then, yes, you call me Sir,' for now, boy," There was a change. This was no longer the voice of a friend--but a Superior. "There will be times when, among others, you must call me Evan' and I will call you Benji,'" for the sake of appearances." From Evan's tone, Benji understood what his name was now--when it wasn't "boy."
Evan quickly pulled out His wallet. He didn't want to wait for the waitress. He knew the bill was between $40 and $50; to avoid any problems, He put down four twenties.
Evan stood up and slapped His thigh. "Come boy."
Chapter 14: A new life begins
Evan led the boy out of the restaurant. As Benji's eyes fell on Evan's form, he inhaled sharply as it happened: he began to see Evan the first time with the eyes of sexual attraction. Everything was as it had been, yet he saw Him in a new way. Everything about Evan was a feast for the eyes and the soul. His trim waist, tapering up into a broad, strong back crowned with square shoulders; His muscled arms, with biceps that pulsed with power. Benji gazed up at Evan's head, savoring even the smallest details: his clean neck, his dark hair, the features of his ears, the outline of his face seen slightly from the side. Evan led him the edge of the parking lot where he'd left his car. As the dusk was spreading, Evan brought the boy around to where the car would block the view of others, and pointed to the ground.
"Kneel boy." Benji dropped. And in that moment, something about Evan was unveiled and released. Benji gasped.
It was, in fact, Evan himself: the force and reality of Himself that he'd held back till now. With Benji's submission, the boundary that had once marked off Benji's mind, feelings, will and soul no longer existed, and Evan began to encroach. At His mating with the boy, He would fully possess and inhabit his mind and soul in a way almost exactly parallel to physical mating that would take place.
As it was, the reality that lay ahead for Benji had drawn much closer, provoking in him a blur of reactions. All at once, he panted for it and also--for the first time, felt fear--something within him recognized (though he could find no words) that coming with Evan was both death--and Life. Now in Benji began the first real dread that of what hed begged to have. Benji was plunging down into great depths, and he struck out for some footing or handhold.
Benji's eyes were drawn upward and he peered, with confusion and longing, into the face that now was inexpressibly beautiful to him. All his feelings were before Evan, and he knew it, as Evan gazed lovingly down at him.
Evan placed His hand on Benji's head, running His fingers through the boy's tangled, bleached locks. He drew His hand down, caressing Benji's face, playfully fondling his right ear, and tracing his thumb along the boy's soft lips. As Evan ran His finger along Benji's straight jaw, He felt just the slightest hint of still invisible stubble.
"Boy, I must say, you've stunned Me. You couldn't have given Me a greater gift--nor a better surprise. I am so pleased; I am so proud of you, boy!"
"Y-y-yes Sir. Thank You Sir."
"Do you have any questions?"
"So many, Sir! i...i don't know where to start."
"Don't be afraid. There will be time for every question, I promise. It will all be right. Trust Me."
"I do! That much i know: i trust You Evan. i mean, Sir."
"What else, boy?"
"There's something more in all this, isn't there, Sir? It's not just sex and attraction, it's not just love. Something about me with You...i don't know how to say it, but it's...part fitting part."
"Yes; you hit on it earlier. Something I saw in you early on, but didnt describe to you. Until now, there was no reason to explain it.
"But as you figured out, My Scent--which can affect anyone, but which is meant for males#--will act much more powerfully on some males more than others. Make no mistake: there is no male of your kind who can resist this power; but some yield more naturally; others resist more, seeking in their own way to dominate, as is their nature.
"And today you faced the truth about yourself, boy--that you are not one who dominates, but one who submits. That's why you were slower to shake off the effect I had on you; and even then, when the opportunity to be enthralled to Me was clear--you wanted it.
"That's why your falling in love with me was confusing at first; why it wasn't sexual in any way. In fact--apart from when you were intoxicated by My Scent--it's only now that you feel any desire for Me, isn't that so, boy?"
"And the truth is, when you were in a fever for Me, it wasn't exactly sexual attraction; it was really just about one thing"--meaning Evan's Phallus--"that's all you were focused on. Until just this evening, you didnt feel that attraction to Me, did you?"
"That's exactly right!"
"Even now, does any other male arouse you?"
"Can you think of any male, any at all, you would want to mount you? To take you?"
"No...no, Sir--not at all." Evan noted the slight hesitation, and by reading Benji's feelings, knew why; but chose to save that for later."
"Do you have any desire to mount another male?"
"Eww! No Sir, i'm sorry, but that is repulsive."
"Nothing to forgive. That's exactly right. For a boy, that is repulsive. What about females, boy?"
"What about them Sir?"
"Do you want to mount a female?"
"No!" Benji was surprised by his sudden reaction. "I...all i can say is, that's just as disgusting."
"Good boy. You don't feel anything for women, now, do you?"
"It's all gone."
"Yes Sir. Nothing there now, Sir. Is it gone forever?"
"Technically, no, not yet; if I wanted to, I could put you back as you were. But--it might as well be. That's never going to happen now, boy; and when I take you fully, then it will be as dead as dead can be."
Benji didnt answer right away.
"Yes, I know; youre starting to wonder about some of this. Its starting to sink in, and youre questioning. Youre having doubts, arent you boy?"
"I..." Benji couldnt answer right away. Evan remained silent, forcing Benji to respond.
"Master--its not doubts, i dont think, but its all so confusing right now. i'm just overwhelmed, Sir.
"It seemed so clear earlier, when we were talking over dinner--it felt so wonderful! But now..."
"Of course, that's normal. When a caterpillar turns into a butterfly, do you think the change comes all at once? Of course not. And your change, from something like a man--from being convinced that you were a man--to being what you really are, and are meant to be...that will take time."
"All right..."--Evan cocked an eyebrow--"Sir," Benji added.
"One thing. At this point, You don't call Me Master.' Till I take You finally, I am Sir' to you. That recognizes the fact that I am Superior, and you are inferior; you are Mine--but that I don't yet fully possess you."
"Also, boy--now is as good a time to tell you this. You know me as Evan Cortino'--that is My legal name to the world. But it isn't My name."
The boy waited, expecting Evan would now tell him His name.
"No. An inferior has no right to know such a thing. When I take you completely, you'll know then. But you'll never be able to speak it--for that is a privilege that belongs only to Superiors.
"Now, boy, there are several things we must do now.
"First, if indeed you will surrender to Me, then that also means--for the sake of the world we live in--I will marry you. Will you marry me, boy?"
A sudden emotion burst up within Benji, washing aside the confusion--and, yes, doubts--hed started having. "Sir! Yes! Yes, of course! Oh yes Sir!"
"Good boy!" Evan patted Benji on the head as He would a pet, and stroked his face.
"Very well then. We are, as you say, engaged.' Your family must know. Of course, you can't have given that much thought; am I right, boy?"
"Yes Sir--not till this very moment. i...i don't know what they'll say."
"We'll plan it. It may be hard. You realize you cannot reveal anything about My special nature or My People. All they can know is that you love Me, I love you; I have asked you to marry Me, and you said yes. We will plan whatever wedding service makes sense. That will be for your family and friends--who, by the way, you must also tell."
"Oh my gosh, Sir, i hadn't considered it! They will...they will freak, Sir."
Evan shrugged. "If they are your friends, they will accept what you are, and be happy in your happiness. If they can't do that...then they were never your friends." Evan reached to squeeze Benji's hand. "Don't worry, my love --I will be there as you need Me--to give you strength."
"Thank You Sir!"
Evan stopped to think a moment. "Theres...the problem of where youll live before I take you..."
"What--wont i live with You? As before, Sir?"
"No, boy, thats impossible, because you've already begun to submit to Me. If you are with Me, delaying our coupling will be painful for both of us, especially you. It would be...*unnatural*--I'd be pushing you away instead of drawing you into Myself, where you belong.
"If we were going to marry tomorrow, it would be no problem. But, out of respect for your family and friends, the wedding must wait several months. Meanwhile, you must remain perfectly chaste, untouched, till then."
Benji blushed. Evan smiled. "Since you permitted Me to read you, boy, I know that you are, indeed, untouched--except, of course, by yourself, as is so common for your kind."
Benji's eyes widened; then he just laughed, prompting chuckles from Evan.
"So, My pet, we will do a couple of things in the next few days. You will talk to your parents. You will tell them about Me, and if they will consent, I will meet them. I will be very candid with you, boy; I could, if you wanted, make it very easy. I can influence your parents..."
"No! i mean--forgive me Sir, please! I mean, if You please, Sir, i'd rather not."
Evan smiled as He pet His boy. "I'm not surprised. I knew you wouldn't want that, boy. I'm pleased. So: we will meet your parents, and it will be as it will be. After that, I'll take you to meet My Parents. That will be strange for you, but otherwise, that will go very well. Don't worry about that at all.
"You'll have to deal with your friends as you think best; but what I expect, boy, is that you don't just try to avoid the matter--not with anyone you really consider a friend, boy."
"I will make arrangements for you to have a place to stay. It will be for your protection, boy. You are My property; I want to keep you safe and unspoiled. Also, there will be some things you will need to learn and do to prepare; I will find someone who can help with that."
Evan reached over and lightly placed His Hand on Benji's crotch. "And this, boy, must be protected. From now on, it must be saved just for Me. No one else, including you, boy."
Benji blushed again. "Yes Sir!"
Chapter 15: Fear and resolve
Evan took Benji home--it was late, Evan and the boy had talked for hours. After he went inside, at first, he was exhilarated from the evening. But as he climbed the stairs to his room, in the dark and quiet of the house--everyone else had been asleep for awhile--the whispered hesitations and fears were now impossible to ignore.
He typed out a text for Trevor: "get together tomorrow? I need you."
Looking for himself in the mirror over his dresser, Benji asked anxiously: "What have i done? What is happening to me?"
he looked down at himself; he was still the same. But as he made a trip to the bathroom and came back, he listened again to his insides, and knew he wasn't. Evan was there--or at least, the imprint of His presence was there. He felt constrained already, as if shackles had already been placed on him, and he wondered how in the world he'd thought it was a good idea to accept them.
But he knew why--that was the thing. He didn't doubt or question that he loved Evan. Evan! *Oh, Evan!* For a moment, thought was suspended as the feelings washed over him. No, that was real--as real as anything he knew.
It wasn't even the notion of "submission," Benji thought, as he undressed for bed. Somehow, he accepted that--because he could still feel, he still knew, that his response was deep, even instinctive.
No, it was all that Evan had told him it would mean. "His pet," Benji finally said as he now stood only in his boxers, only to be surprised--and troubled--when this image caused a sudden surge of arousal to give him an immediate hard-on that poked out the fly.
"What have i done?" Looking down at himself, Benji stared as his own seven-inch erection bobbed in the cool air. Benji started to touch himself and then drew back quickly with a surprising horror at the thought. Even so, he gave into the feeling now overflowing him. He let it carry him along like a wave of the ocean. And it wasn't long before it carried him to thoughts of Evan. He recalled His Face, His Gaze, from the evening. And now it wasn't just arousal--it was euphoria. He felt wonderful. Every anxiety and doubt vanished.
Suddenly Benji was utterly relaxed. He crawled under the sheet, curled up and quickly fell asleep.
The next day, Saturday, Benji practically leapt out of bed at 5 am; he couldn't remember when he'd felt so good waking up. As he got to his chores, some of the things that had been on his mind the night before came creeping back; getting right to work helped. Also, he hadn't forgotten Trevor; he felt terrible about how he'd pushed him away, and he worried about how the conversation would go--but he had to get this behind him. And while he feared a confrontation or an argument, he had a sense that of all people, maybe Trevor could help him make sense of things.
Around 8--just as the family was getting breakfast, a text came back from Trevor. "Sure; afternoon works better; let me know asap if it needs to be sooner."
Benji wanted to get to it right away, but he remembered he owed his dad some extra work from yesterday. And he figured Trevor was planning to be at his job this morning as well. He started to ask his dad, took a deep breath, and then realized--no, he could see Trevor after lunch.
"Dad, do you mind if, after lunch, I get together with Trevor?"
"That should work fine; things are in good shape, and we made a good start already this morning."
Benji quickly texted back to Trevor, who replied he'd swing by after he got off work at noon.
Benji begged off lunch with his parents; his mom made him a sandwich, and another one for Trevor. He was waiting on the porch when Trevor drove up. He was driving the beat up red pickup he usually drove. When he stopped, Benji hurried out and got in the cab.
As he pulled away, Benji looked over at his best friend, taller and bigger than he was. He'd been working at the store and was dressed for it; he was wearing worn jeans and a faded blue t-shirt with its sleeves ripped away, and open down both sides; that gave Benji a perfect profile view of Trevor's full pecs, overhanging a rippled eight-pack, all overspread lightly but evenly with brown hair; Benji noticed for the first time how far his friend's nipples stuck out--like pencil points. Glancing down a little further, Trevor's jeans showed an ample package as always.
It's not that Benji had never noticed--but since last night, while he wasn't in any way turned on by Trevor, he was...more aware; more appreciative.
As they approached the main road, Trevor asked, "so where you wanna go?"
"How bout Lookout Point?" Trevor nodded and turned right to head that way. It was a secluded point, back on a country road, where Trevor and he often went, over the years. It'd be a great place for them to talk.
As they drove, Benji noticed Trevor's hair was as close-trimmed as always; and while he was usually clean-shaven, today he had a day or two's stubble on his face.
Trevor glanced over as he drove; "So, little brother, how are you doing?"
Benji looked confidently back into the deep brown eyes of his friend. "Bottom line? Good, and in some ways, not good. But first: i know i kind of closed you out the past few weeks. And i apologize. I'm gonna tell you why; i hope you understand. But Trevor, the past two months have just been insane, and; to tell you the truth, this took a lot for me to do this. It's just...you're my best friend, so i have to tell you. But i'm really sorry about the way i treated you lately."
Nothing seemed to intimidate Trevor, including speeding down a curvy, country road while looking intently at Benji. "Ben, how many times have I told you--you can tell me anything. If you're in some kind of trouble..."
"No, it's not trouble. It's...well, we're almost there. Let's get there first, and then i'll figure out how to tell you."
Another mile, they pulled off onto an unpaved path that led up onto a bluff; most cars shouldn't attempt it, but this was the sort of thing Trevor's pickup was made for. When they got to a mostly level spot, Trevor parked and they got out. They had a great view of Lake Oroville, but neither of them were looking at that.
Trevor grabbed Benji by the shoulders, and focused his deep brown eyes directly into his. "Now tell me! What is it?"
"I'm in love."
Trevor stared at him, blinked...waiting...
"With a man."
Trevor, his gaze still fixed on Benji's, didn't move a muscle as he took that in. Then, lifting his face, looking around a little--obviously thinking, he finally let go of Benji's shoulders, nodded slightly, and said. "OK." Then he smiled a huge smile at Benji, and clapped him on the shoulders affectionately.
Benji sagged suddenly--he'd been so keyed up, so afraid of this moment, he couldn't believe it would be this easy.
"You aren't...i mean, i figured you'd be stunned. i know i was!"
Trevor gestured for them both to sit down on against the slope, and they did. "It's your roommate from last year, right? His name is Evan?"
"That was who you were with last night?"
"How'd you know?"
"Dummy, I was at the pool, remember? Last night, you were in date mode.' Don't try to deny it. So, when you ran off to change, I decided to catch up with you, to get a look at this girl. Since you never drive to the pool, I figured there was good chance you were meeting her there.
Well, I have to admit, I didn't expect to see a man--but when I did, it started to all add up.
When Trevor saw Benji's stunned reaction, he continued. "OK, look. You come back from school and you're a wreck. Sure looked like a broken heart. But with whom? All year, you know who you talked about the most? Evan. A couple of times, you talked about this or that girl, but mostly it was him.
"I mean, of course I assumed it was a girl; but when I thought about it, you would've told me that. Why wouldn't you? We've talked about a lot of girls over the years; this wouldn't have been the first one to break your heart. So when you didn't open up--starting before school ended--I knew something was off.
"Plus, I met him. When you went into the locker room, I walked over, struck up a conversation. First, he was checking me out. That's ok, I don't care. I don't swing that way, as you know, but if he wants to get a look, hell, I'm flattered. Anyway, we got talking. I just said something like, you look like you're new around here, are you looking for something, and he said, thanks, but he was waiting for someone. And I said, oh yeah, that's my best friend. Then he grins and says, wait--are you Trevor? And I said, yeah, I am. And we talked a few minutes, but I cleared out before you came out."
"Wait--so, Evan told you about us?"
"Not at all. He didn't say anything about that. But he didn't have to. I saw you; I saw Him. It's perfect, Ben. It fits. I'm happy for you!"
Benji stared at Trevor, and then he just started laughing and shouting. "This is incredible! I can't believe this! This is...what the hell?!
"For the past few days, it's been like my world was turned upside down and inside out. I didn't think it could get any crazier..."
"Look, Ben, there's something most people won't see, but I see; and I know Evan sees it."
"And that is?"
"Ben, you're a boy. That's what I said to Evan. "I looked at him, and I said, Ben's a *good boy,* isn't he?' And Evan got a funny smile, like he could see everything, and he looked at me--like he could see right through me--and he nodded, "oh yes; *Benji's* a very good *boy.*"
I shook his hand, and said, I'm thinking we'll meet again. I hope we do." He said something about the same--and that was it.
"And there it is. By the way, I noticed he called you Benji. That'll take me some getting used to, but--it's right. You're Benji. And what you are just beginning to understand, about this world and how you fit into it is, some people in this world take charge, and some follow. It's not always the right people, but it's how it is. And you know what kind I am. I take charge. I took charge of you, back in eighth grade. I've been in charge of you ever since. How's that worked out, Benji?"
Benji was stunned. Until yesterday, no one had talked to him this way; now, in less than 24 hours, another man he respected and admired was striking the same chord in his soul, getting the same reactions.
"Trevor, I...I didn't know you...this was how you thought..."
Trevor shrugged. "I began to figure this out a couple of years ago. I began reading things about people who are dominant and submissive. It didn't take me long to recognize myself in all that; but more than that, to see that that's how so many of my relationships were working out.
"And at the same time, I figured *you* out. You're a submissive, Ben--Benji--that doesn't make you a bad person; it's just *who you are.* Benji, I don't want to get all mushy on you, but--you're not just some guy I know; you're my closest friend. I love you; you're like my brother. And I figured out that in a world in which some are subs and some are dominants, then some of us are supposed to watch out for you little guys, to protect you, to keep you safe. And dammit--isn't that exactly what I've done all this time?"
Benji tried to answer, and choked up; so he nodded vigorously instead.
"So--you're a boy! Is that so bad...*boy?*"
"Mmmm...that's good Benji. Good!
"So what's the problem?"
"I'm scared, Trevor--wait, do i need to call you Sir?"
Trevor chuckled. "*Need* to? Well, let's answer that second. But if you're asking, do I expect you to? No. I like our friendship the way it is, so why would I change it? I know what I am; and I've known for some time what you were, but since I wasn't looking for a boy--as good a boy as you are--I didn't see any reason to get into this with you.
"So back to the need to' question. If you *need* to call me Sir, then Ill be honored. But if you want to call me Trevor, I'd like that."
"OK! So let's get back to it. You know who you are and you have a Man. What's wrong with that picture for you?"
"I'm scared Trevor. Last night, Evan and I talked for hours. We were together the night before that, too. And, you're right, there was something at work all year--but believe me, I had no idea. Would you believe me if I tell you, I didn't feel a thing for Him--not really--until a few nights ago?"
"Yeah, I would."
"See, that's what I think no one is going to believe."
"That's because they don't understand what you're discovering--what I told you about. Let me guess: last night, Evan explained it all too. Am I right?"
"That's exactly what happened. That's part of what's scary."
"You mean what he told you about being a sub scares you?"
"So, what did He tell you?"
Benji started telling Trevor about it: about being property, having no rights, being possessed. When he came to the part about Evan's special gifts, he realized he couldn't share that. So he skirted mostly around that, just saying, "He explained to me that all this would change me totally."
After hearing it all, Trevor said, "There's more you're not telling me, isn't there?"
"Yes. Because He would not want me to."
"Then, *boy*--" Trevor smiled as he deliberately used the special word--"you did right not telling me. And, no matter what I ask you, don't tell me anything you aren't sure you are free to. That'll mess things up. But I think I can ask some questions that you can answer.
"First: does He love you?"
"Oh yes, Trevor."
"OK. Do you think He is going to harm you? Injure you, be cruel to you, try to warp you, make you do evil things?"
"Not at all Trevor. But Hes going to change me."
"Yeah, but that's how it works. You need Him, Ben. That's the whole thing. If you don't need Him, then walk away. But you can't, can you? Because you *do* need him. That's what makes you a sub. You need a Man. That's what and who you are, Benji. That's what a boy is!"
"Or a girl?"
"Sure--for Men like me. But He wanted a boy. He got you. And you need Him. It's perfect! You're so lucky!"
"But, it's like, He's going to turn me into His pet! Doesn't that bother you?"
"No--why should it?"
"You wouldn't think less of me?"
Trevor gently shook his head. Again, he reached out and took Benji's shoulders in his hands. "Oh Benji! Think less of you? I already told you I know what you are--and I love you like my own skin. If he leads you on a leash, that's where you belong. Why do Masters leash their pets, Ben? Is it to hurt them? To torture them?"
"No. In fact, it's to protect them--and keep them close. Does it demean a dog to be on a leash?"
"No--but i'm not a dog, Trevor."
Trevor shrugged. "You are what you are. If you accept it, you will be happy. If you don't, you won't. You know how dogs and cats ended up being pets for people, don't you?"
"Yeah, we talked about this once. they came to the people."
"Exactly. And it made them happy. He's going to make you happy, Benji. If He puts you on a leash, it's good for you. So what if you're a pet. Don't you want to be happy?"
"But I've never been with a Man; never wanted to, until a few days ago! I can't believe i'm gonna say this, but...if i was going to be with a Man, it would have been *you,* Trevor!" That made Trevor smile, and Benji paused, surprised by his word. "Look, i mean, ok, i'm a sub, but what Dom did i meet first: it was you; why didn't it happen with you?"
Trevor laughed. "Thanks buddy, that's...flattering! And you're right in a way. This is what most people don't see. When you're a sub, the primary thing isn't *sexual* orientation; it's *power* orientation. It's His Power that attracted you. Why him first?" Trevor shrugged. "Who cares; be happy--falling for me wouldn't have done you any good.
"And you know what, Ben--Benji? Maybe, all this time, you kinda did fall' for me, just a little? I mean, you've been my sidekick all this time.
"And--don't freak out about this, but...Look"--Trevor nodded to draw Benji's attention to an obvious erection, which he had been too into the conversation to notice.
"Oh, g-d, Trevor, i'm so sorry..."
"Why should you be sorry? You know what? I saw you get a boner almost right away. And if you hadn't, then I'd've known something was wrong.
"I know that isn't for me. It's for Him--right?"
"And that's how it should be. But what is it that's getting to you, right now? It's talking about His *Power.* And after you experienced that, let me guess: the sexual feelings came later; right?"
Benji nodded, his eyes wide with happy surprise to have his friend understand it all so well. After a pause, Trevor added, "There's something else."
"Yeah, Trevor, there is. i know everything you said it true, same as i knew it when Evan said it. And yet...still, i don't know if i can follow through."
"Oh, Benji, do you really think you're the first sub that bucked and fought against becoming what it is? You've seen what happens with horses, being broken?"
"It's the same. Don't worry. He'll get the job done. Yeah, you're gonna buck and fight. But unless I'm very mistaken about Evan--and I don't think I am--and, I know I'm not mistaken about you--it's gonna work. You won't throw Him off your back; He'll break you. And when he does, you're going to be so happy! You know that, don't you?"
Benji closed his eyes tight. He suddenly felt tears. Trevor suddenly felt very tenderly toward Benji. "Aw, good boy, *good boy!*" he said, rubbing Benji's head. "Hey, Benji, it's getting on, I better get you back."
As Trevor drove back, he said, "It's not up to me, of course, but I hope I get another chance to meet him."
Then Benji put his hands in his face and said, "oh i'm so stupid! I can't believe i left out this out, i'm sorry...He asked me to marry Him!"
Trevor threw his head back and laughed. "That's great, Benji! It's perfect! Oh, I'm so happy for you. So...you're inviting me--well, you can't, that'll be up to Evan--but you're saying you want me at the wedding?"
"Aw, geez, of course! You're my best man! Or whatever its called, damn right i want you there!"
"It all fits. Dude, I'm so happy for you. I know you're scared, but you trust Evan, and you trust me. Look: we both agree this is so right for you! I know it's going to be hard with some folks. But--this is right. you know it."
"So have you told your family?"
"No, that's next."
"Hoo boy! Then I need to get you back!"
(To be continued!)